Pick and Choose

Dear You,

I've been listening to wives talk about their lives. And it's true -- they think and act differently from men.

An overheard example -- J. was talking with K. about how she (J.) had bought and owned houses in the past 30 or so years. Looked at a lot. Compared features. Talked about them with various friends. Finally settled on one: "Well, it has potential. We could . . ." and off would start a multi-year plan to fix this, add that, reorganize the other . . . paint or wallpaper or redo the kitchen flooring . . . you get the idea. Spouse: "Whatever you think, Dear." And I remember a process 15 years or so ago, trudging through several houses and opening the door to this one, thinking, "Ah, yes. Perfect." This morning I'm putting a second coat of paint on the walls of the back bedroom.

It was the same way a couple of years ago, when we found our "snowbird home" in Florida. Three days of "not a chance" (in my mind, at least) followed by, "Ah, yes. Perfect" for the one we now have there.

I suspect (not really knowing the female mind as well as I ought after all these years of studying them) that this process is consistent across a range of issues. In the early 90s I found myself in search of a companion. When I found K. I thought, "Ah, yes. Perfect." For her part, after several months of considering X, Y and Z, I can now imagine her thinking finally -- as now -- "Well, he has potential. I could . . ."

Oops, excuse me a minute . . . I hear her calling me. (Whatever you say, Dear.)